How about we remove the word "OFFENDED" from our Christian vocabulary. That way, we who are brothers in Christ can say what's on our hearts. Those who hear it would know that we are loved and what is being said is just their observation or opinion and we should examine it from their point of view.
If we are to be Christ like then we need to love our enemy...pray for them, maybe even listen to what's being said, as it may be something the Lord wants you to hear. So let’s not get offended when we hear something we don’t like! Check out 2nd Cor. 13:5. Christ wasn't offended when His own disciples denied Him, abandoned Him, and didn’t trust in Him, did He get offended…NO! And when at His trial He was falsely accused, stripped naked, brutally beaten, and then nailed to the cross, was He offended… NO, he stated, “Father forgive them for they know not what they do!”
Jesus was teaching us that some of us are blind, which means they can’t see. Some of us have a deficiency in our hearing. So I ask you, would you get mad a blind man who bumps into you? If someone were deaf would you get offended because you had to repeat yourself several times to be understood? I hope not, I hope you would have compassion for them.
Here’s one example where one might get offended. I got a forwarded email from a good friend who attends worship, Bible studies and is very involved with going on retreats with other Christians. The email contained a video.
In this video a man throws a glass bottle out his front door and it hits a skateboarder, knocking him off his board. The skate board hits another teen, who had a basketball and it knocks him out. You then see a woman being dragged through the streets by her dog, who is chasing the basketball. An old man with a hearing problem continues to ring a house bell because he couldn’t hear it, which distracts another person who is about to shoot a bow and arrow. The archer completely misses his target and hits the first man (who threw the bottle) in the arm. The man staggers into the street in pain from the arrow, where in a nano-second you see him smashed by a passing semi. Caption at the end,
“There will be consequences if you voted Democrat!”
So I ask you, if you have any Christian friends who will admit that they voted for Obama, or claim to be a Democrat, do you think that this video would offend them?
Here’s another example.
I went to help a friend and his family move his household goods that were in storage in to his rental truck.. After a few times of him speaking to me he asked me if I had my hearing aids on and I said no. He stated that I should have because he was finding difficult getting across what he wanted to say.
I agreed that I should have, but explained that because he was moving all his stuff I didn’t want to take the chance of getting them dirty. I then mentioned that this would be a good time for him to learn how to communicate with someone who has a hearing problem. From my experience many people who need them are not wearing them. Maybe we should get out of our comfort zone and adjust our volume and make sure we face them when we speak.
Paul states in Philippians 2:3, "Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves;"
So I hope you can see from this example we each could have been offended…Am I right? He could have gotten frustrated and asked me to leave or I could have been hurt by his comment and left..
But as this man and I claim Christ as Lord of our lives, we know that speaking what we believe to one another should not be offensive. Being able to say what we think gives us the freedom to be honest.
Prov. 24: 26, "Honesty is like a kiss on the Lips" (NIV)
So would you agree that those of us who claim Christ as Lord, and truly understand what He went through to save a wretched soul like you and I, that we cannot and will not be offended by another brother or sister who has been genuinely adopted into His Glorious Kingdom for eternity! What we should do is as Paul reminded us in 2Cor. 13:5, "Test yourselves to see if you are in the faith; examine yourselves! Or do you not recognize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you--unless indeed you fail the test?"
In other words if there is something that the Lord wants me to hear from a fellow believer, I should humble myself and listen. I heard this years ago from my Pastor, Darryl DelHousaye, “Remember don’t shoot the messenger, listen to the message.”
Now for those we encounter who are, lost, who think they are righteous... you meet some of them in church. Remember we are either lost or saved, there is no in between! We need to treat them as if they are blind, which they are. I don’t think you would get offended if a blind man bumped into you, would you? So the same should apply to them as well. We would need to ask for forgiveness if they were offended, oh and by the way, that group (the lost) will be offended, that’s all they know.
But we, having the Grace of God bestowed upon us by the Holy Spirit should recognize that and pray for them. But please, never, never minimize the whole truth of the Gospel. They need to hear how they have violated a Holy God by breaking His Commandments; you only need to go through 4 to get the point across. Once they realize that they can’t save themselves by doing good works, or by saying the so -called sinners prayer, then they should be ready to repent. They would turn away from that life style, be “Born Again “, and then place their trust in Jesus Christ alone.
So now that I've said it... isn't it great that I don't have to state,
“Please forgive me if I offended anyone. “
This next part is amazing! Chuck Johnson, a good freind of mine, wrote the following poem after he read the above. I hope you read it, and comment about it.
4 comments:
No offense taken!
If we must mince words for political correctness (a contradiction in terms) and fear of "offending" someone, don't we lose something in clear communication?
I'd rather know where a person stands than have them lie in order to avoid offending me. How can you trust such a person?
You never know if they're telling you the truth or just what they think you want to hear. And how would they really know what I want to hear anyway?
ALL liars will have their part in the lake of fire. (Rev 21:8 )
I would much rather a person take the chance of offending me in truth, than take the chance of ending up in hell for telling a "white lie" to supposedly spare my feelings and keep me from being offended.
"A bruised reed Jesus did not break:....so He was Not offensive on purpose, He met people where they were out....WHAT IS THE MOTIVE-His was pure, of course, He could look into peoples hearts but again,...He was gentle w/ babes and corse sometimes w/ Authorities who were Liars and Cons. But a bruised reed-already broken, He will not break.
We need to be careful that we don't offend any of the little ones-He says.
REMEMBER ITS HIS MINISTRY right?? He WILL guide it and direct it.
There may have been only 12 guys that were able to listen to Jesus and do what He says initially. So don't worry about numbers, if most people are carnal and asleep, don't let it frustrate us. We need to seek fellowship w/ those strong believers that will help anchor our sanity in the koinonia fellowship. Amen
Thomas:
I appreciate what you are saying, however, you need to also examine the WAY things are presented.
I am Mexican American. There are many things that people say and joke about from a Christian perspective and that is NOT who Christ was. Including this topic. Please do not tell me what I should and shouldn't feel. I follow the word of the Lord closely in my personal life as well as in my professional life.
I am human, and offended also means hurt. I have learned that it is okay to let someone I love and value know when I am hurt and if they too are willing, they can examine themselves and we can work to go forward.
It means that a person has sorrow for the situation. Chuck and I know each other well enough to share those feelings and I honor him for that.
Thomas, thank you, but unless I ask for your advice, please do not give it to me. I have a pastor, friends I love and respect and a counselor that I can check in with for accountability.
I believe that what you are trying to convey is love, I just wish that you would understand that is not how it is coming across, it appears to be more of judgment, not to mention that this took place weeks ago and we have moved on, I hope you have done the same.
Take Care,
You make some good points; but I think it's hard to remove the word "offended" from dialog between those who call themselves Christians. And the usage is a valuable indicator.
1) The real cause of offense is not the availability of the word offense or reckless use of the word; but some combination of unrepentance, self righteousness, selfish pride, arrogance, impatience, or unforgiveness... all evidence of the unsanctified heart.
2) As Paul said, the Gospel is offensive to many who aren't saved. He pointed his example to two major cultures of his day. He said that the message of the cross is shameful to the Jew and foolishness to the Greek. Many who claim to be Christians, but who are false converts, will find comfort in the grayness of tolerance, not wanting to take the narrow stance that the Gospel actually requires. So many theologically correct discussions of salvation will be offensive to them.
3) I think that the narrowness of the Gospel can be offensive initially to some who have been saved out of liberal, tolerant "christian" churches (in spite of the heretical message they've heard preached there). Such offense would be only temporary before God opens their eyes to the truth.
4) Removing the word offense from anybody's "vocal quiver of terms" isn't going to remove the state of offense, the cause of offense (nor the potential for offense) from any unsanctified heart. We know that Jesus told us in Luke 6:45 that the mouth speaks what is very prevalent within the character of the person. So if the character is easily offended (due to the causes I mentioned in number 1 above), removing the word will simply cause frustration for not having a handy word to describe the reality. Luke 6:45 definitely pertains to the self-righteous unsaved person, one who is neither justified or sanctified. But it also makes sense that it could apply to the born-again person who has been justified but hasn't yet seen sanctification in that area of offense. While sanctification is the outward evidence of true salvation, it can come painfully slowly for some true Christians. Now if the prevalent character continues to be easily offended over a long period of time or is continually offended over a long period about what Jesus said about the gospel, then the evidence becomes increasingly clear that the person is not truly saved. So what is it that really drives that change of heart that is sanctification? The Holy Spirit does as He imparts His fruit (Fruit of the Spirit). He imparts it in concert with the person's obedient action via several means: truthful reflection, self examination, confession of our sins one to another, prayer, renewing our mind, taking every thought captive, and a repentant attitude.
While we can't realistically remove the word offend, we shouldn't want to. It's a useful indicator. But I'll bet that your blog discussion about removing it could prompt the true Christian to do some of these things that the Holy Spirit works into Fruit. And the offenses will cease.
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